Now I am sitting in this beautiful resort in Disney trying like hell to stay awake (thank the good Lord for my iPad) in a CLE seminar with... Get this... 1200 other marital and family law attorneys. Not only can you vividly imagine the excruciating boredom, but just imagine the potential for a bombing!!!
And just imagine once we are all blown away, the amount of argument and pompous pontificating at those pearly gates just to get IN!
Yep, I am bored out of my frickin mind and am running these images through my head using Disney characters as my pontificating colleagues. Can't help it. Not only is boredom causing me to hallucinate despite the 17 cups of coffee I have had, but the two fat boys sitting to my right who have already gone through two baskets of candy are the spitting image of the Chipmunks.
The dude behind me with the striped shirt and god-awful tie who apparently just graduated law school and is listening to this crap as if it is the bible being read by Jesus himself is the spitting image of Goofy. Same long face, same buck teeth - pretty impressive actually.
And let's not forget Balou up on the stage who is about ready to have an orgasm enlightening this audience on the "exciting" area of motions in limine and the "sublime gratification" (uggghhhhh,) of doing an "auspicious" job for your clients.
Now, look, I don't expect these things to be titillating but it would be much more exciting to watch the grass grow!!!!
Pity me my friends! I love being an attorney - after all these years I still feel passion for the law. But as I sit here.......
Feel my boredom, agitation and frustration in knowing that these characters are my colleagues. That I actually spent years and a truckload of money to join this group of pompous, pontificating, self-indulgent asses. Somebody shoot me! (twice please - to make sure I am dead!)
-Posted from Elena's iPad
Location:Disney Resort, Orlando, Florida