Thursday, December 23, 2010


we brought my dad home from the hospital to die.  I went back to read the posts and all the wonderful messages I received during this time last year and once again feel humbled by so many wonderful friends.

I miss my dad.  I miss him so damned much.  Today is one of those days I'd like to crawl into a corner and just cry from the frustration and impotence I STILL feel over losing him.

Every day I want to pick up a phone and call him.  Tell him about some crazy client, chit chat about this or that.  And I can't.  I have never heard his voice again and I miss that.  Doesn't that sound crazy?

His wife has tons and tons of videos at her house.  I still have not been able to see one.  Soon.  I will.  I really really just want to hear him say "que paso mija"?  Three little words out of the mouth of a man who has left such a huge whole in my heart.

I love you dad.  I love you so much.  You have no idea how much you are missed.


  1. I love you Elena
    you have wonderful memories
    but i feel your pain
    my heart breaks for you sweety
    one day you will be able to watch those videos.

    Lillian Mederak.

  2. Hello Elena,

    your dad was a lucky man to be loved so much !
    It's a difficult period to loose a loved one. Celebrations seems to be more difficult.

    Time will heal, but I know that takes sometimes a looong time...Cherish the moments and memories you have and DO watch the videos. Of course you will cry, but it brings him a little bit back when you can see him move, can hear him talk,..

    strenght and greetings from Belgium

  3. Your dad was such a great guy! I still remember our trip. How much he enjoyed spending the time with you and Kristina. He will never be forgotten - you have an angel in heaven watching over you. Love you, Lilly